Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Being a mum

I don't mean to sound cliched, but being a mum is the most rewarding thing that I do. I just love getting cuddles and being told, by my kids, that they love me. But gosh, I don't think I need to tell you that being a mum is also be the hardest thing I do.

The trouble at the moment, is with the middle child. It was awesome, when at two and a half years of age, he toilet trained himself. Not only did he manage himself during the day, but also at night. (I remember when I was in the throws of toilet training the first child, that when I heard about kids toilet training themselves, I wanted to kick something. Seriously, it can happen, but I think it's more likely to happen with subsequent children, not first born kiddies).

Anyway, over the past month, things have changed. He's gone from being totally capable, to a bed wetting, pant wetting mess. He needs help with everything and most times doesn't even try to go to the toilet, choosing instead to just wet his pants and IT'S DRIVING ME NUTS!!

Yesterday, he wet his pants 4 times, then wet his bed during his lunch nap, then moved to his brothers bed and wet it too!! I think it's easy to say that mums should remain calm or relax during these trying times, but it would take a saint to stay calm for this long. I sway from being a calm, 'it's OK' mum, to being a wild, angry mum - why won't he go to the toilet!!!!!

Yesterday, I took him to the doctor, hoping that he has a UTI or something. I desperately want there to be a magical pill to fix this drama, but I'm not that lucky.

So, we've taken a back step. Last night he wore a nappy to bed. Today, I tried to get him to wear a nappy and he refused. In the end, I just asked that if he wasn't going to use the toilet, that he should stand on a hard floor to wet his pants. I'm so tired of cleaning the couch or the carpet.

Clearly, I just need to give us both a break and try to reduce some of the tension and anxiety. He's at daycare for the next few days, while I'm at uni, so hopefully that will help.

I'd be more than happy to hear any helpful suggestions from mums that have been through this.

Now a photo for the post. On Sunday, we attended a fun little party at the Train Shed in Luddenham. The kids had a ball, riding on James from Thomas and Friends, and enjoying party food on an old red rattler.
Train ride on James

The weather was a little chilly, but the kids didn't mind.
Looking at Gordon

Tis all for now. I'm supposed to be finishing off an assignment.

7 comments:

  1. I hear ya. One or both of mine go through that phase every couple of months, sometimes together. It is really frustrating, I agree. Sometimes I make them go to the toilet when I think they are doing the "wee wee dance" or just when I think it's about time they should go. It tends to help. I play a game where I give them a shoulder ride to the toilet, which is a novelty they love and takes the emphasis on where I'm taking them. The phase usually passes after a few days. The photos look great, I'm yet to download ours. The boys spent some time doing the puzzle together today. Thanks.

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  2. Stella is weeing on the floor way too often at the moment as well - and she is almost four! Still in a night nappy anyway, so that isn't a problem. We tried a reward chart, which worked well for a week but today she ripped it off the wall and said she doesn't want it any more. I think it's all about control. There are lots of changes and stressed parents in her little life at the moment, and I think that when and where she wees is the one thing that she can control. Not that we can do much about it, but at least it makes me a little less cranky when it happens....good luck Christy!

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  3. I'm sorry to not have a solution but I thought you might like to hear that my sister's son has been doing the same thing after being toilet trained for a while. She thinks he has just gotten lazy and he thinks it's funny to wee in his pants! She is hoping he will realise that it's not socially acceptable soon, especially at pre school...I hope you get some relief soon!

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  4. I hear you on the toilet training. My first daughter was a breeze to train but my twins have been far more challenging. I've had far more accidents that I want to remember. I've found that keeping a relaxed attitude really does keep the process on track. The whole thing is frustrating because you can only influence not control the process. I really worked on accentuating the positive ("I know you can go, you've done it before") and eliminate the negative comments "everyone else is trained" etc. In the end, you know they will be trained it's just a matter of how much laundry you can deal with until then..!!

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  5. THis happened with my middle child (a boy). He was happy as a lark to continue playing in his wet pants. He was totally play driven. He didn't want to stop playing to toliet. So I decided to make him change his own clothes (if he didn't he had to sit in the kitchen until he was ready to do it), put the wet ones in the washing machine, clean himself up up with baby wipes, wash his hands and redress himself. As you can imagine all that took way more time away from his play than if he had just used the toliet in the first place. 48 hours latter he never wet his pants again. And I didn't have to get upset on the outside (on the inside a little bit). It actually felt good to give him the control along with the responsibility. Now I will also add that we lived in a house with all hardwood flooring everywhere. And his pants wetting didn't seem to make messes anywhere except in his pants (he was dry through the night). If it was couches and beds I would have freaked out a bunch.

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  6. hey love, so he is wanting your attention hey! hang in there!! xx

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